Another Year

Apr 192012
 

Today I’m going to do something I’ve never done before:  feature an old post (one year ago today, to be exact).

Don’t worry, it’s not something that I plan to make a habit of, it’s just that I really can’t find any new words to express how I feel.

I’ll try to have something more uplifting for you tomorrow.

:::

This time of year is always hard for me.

Not just because I’m so sick of winter that I could puke and crave the warmth of the sun and the fresh spring air.

No, it’s another reason that brings about a lot of memories.  I wish that I could say that these were good memories, but they are not.  They are reminders of an event that was very painful for me, and others in my family.

You see, 12 years ago today I lost my best friend:  my Mom.

This picture was taken when she finished nursing school in the mid-1950s.

As I’m sure you have guessed, today is not the only day that I think about her, but it is one of several days a year that I miss her the most.

When she quietly passed away, she was finally free from the pain that she had endured from Rheumatoid Arthritis for 7 years.  For those years, she was unable to do the things that she loved the most:  garden and crochet.  She had to end her nursing career early on in the disease because her entire body became affected, and at the time there was no medically known way to deal with it.  She became a guinea pig to the medical establishment, whose doctors were the best in the world.

I was looking back at some old files on my computer the other day, and found something that I had written around this time 8 years ago.

A real keepsake does not need to be a piece of jewelry or an item that is displayed in a home.  I feel that it can be something that a person carries with them in their mind and heart.  It has special meaning; a presence.  For me, it is my hands.  I look at my hands and see my mother, and the gifts that she gave to me.

She taught me that my hands could make meals that would feed my family.  They could dig the ground to plant seeds to that would grow to can vegetables to store for future meals.  They would work the land, feel the dirt and pull the weeds.  They would also nurture delicate flowers to blossom and grow; to show beauty.

Her love for playing the piano that she passed down to me with lessons, encouraging me on with her words as my fingers played the notes and listened from the audience as I played in concerts.

The patience and time my mother would take to teach me how to knit and crochet…to create beautiful slippers, potholders, and afghans.  The blankets that I make, asking for her guidance as I work each stitch, hoping that they will turn out as beautiful as hers always did.

My hands look older than their 38 years.  They have planted many gardens, crocheted blankets for babies and families. Blazed trails and built bridges.  Flipped burgers and cleaned tables at restaurants   They have wiped tears and nursed cuts.   I look at my hands and see a lifetime.

My children often ask me what my mother gave me that I cherish the most.

And I tell them about my mother’s hands.

These are just a few of the things that come to mind when I think about her.  There are many other wonderful memories, like how we always used to spend our birthdays together (since they were a day apart) either getting our hair done, going out to eat or meeting up at a casino to gamble (one of her favorites).

One thing I never do is make this a sad day for myself, because there are so many wonderful things that I have in my life because of her.  The many things she taught me that I am able to pass down to my children and grandchildren.

I have to tell you I am not a fan of these kinds of posts.  I do not like to talk about sad things.  So instead of this being something sad, I would like to think of it as the remembrance of truly remarkable woman and all of the good and happy things that her life represented.

Thank you for allowing me to share this with you.

Phyllis Mary (Papenheim) Larson

October 22, 1935 – April 19, 1999

The Book That Changed My Attitude

Apr 182012
 

Yesterday was shit.

Let me correct that:  yesterday my attitude was shit.  Don’t ask me why, but it was just one of those days when I didn’t want to be around people and if you looked at me the wrong way you ran the risk getting killed by “the look.”

I hate those days.  Hate.  HATE.  HATE.  And there’s absolutely nothing I can do about it.  If someone had tried to be all Mary Sunshine and tell me to look on the bright side of things, I think I would have shoved that sunshine somewhere on their person.

So on days like those, I try to just shut out everyone in the world and focus on my little crappy space and hope that the day comes to an end quickly and that no one gets hurt.

My foul mood came to a quick halt when I arrive home and opened the front door to a *plop* from a little brown package from Amazon.com.

WOOT!  It arrived!!  I’ve been waiting a billion years for this to come (OK, a month or so, but it seemed much longer) and it showed up at just the right moment.

Jenny Lawson, aka The Bloggess, is one of the funniest, frankest, craziest women to rule the blogesphere.  The best part about her?  She’s 100% real.  From taxidermied alligators to her love affair with Will Wheaton, she’ll keep you coming back everyday for more.

When I opened the book, I didn’t need to go any farther than the “thank you” page to know that this book was going to make my telleveryonetoorderthisbookbecauseitsdabomb list:

“I want to thank everyone who helped me create this book,

except for that guy who yelled at me in Kmart when I was eight

because he thought I was being “too rowdy.”

You’re an asshole, sir.”

Everyone should be as honest as that!

Thanks for coming through when I needed you most, Jenny.  Your book made me laugh out loud* (which brought strange looks from the cats) and made my shitty attitude melt away.

I wish I had some taxidermied frogs to send you as a thank you gift, but my daughter kinda freaked out when I told her what they were and when I found them many years later they were kinda gross.

 

*Seriously, the chapter “Stanley, the Magical Talking Squirrel” had me laughing so hard that tears were running down my cheeks!

 

It’s All About Easy

Apr 172012
 

Once in a while I write about recipes that I really like and that tend to be easy to make, and the other night I was wracking my brain trying to come up with something for supper and “Wham, bam, thankyoumam”, it came to me:  Hash.

Super simple meal that only has 4 main ingredients (I like those the best), takes little time to prepare (bonus points*) and contains 2 food groups that Rick loves:  meat and potatoes (those are food groups, right?).

Here’s what you need:

Ground sausage (any kind – plain, Italian, moose**)

Potatoes (I like to use leftover home fries)

Mushrooms

Onion

Here’s what you’re gonna do:  Brown up the sausage and onion together and drain.  While those are set aside, cook up your taters.  When those are done, mix in some mushrooms.  Add the sausage and onion mixture and heat everything through.  DONE!

What, you expected something complicated?  I thought you knew me!

Here comes a little secret ingredient that takes it over the top:  Liquid Smoke.  Throw in one or teaspoons of this lovely liquid after everything is mixed together and you have just entered Yummyville.

Now, you’ll notice I didn’t tell you how much of each ingredient you need.  Bwahahahaha!  That’s because you get to determine how much you like depending on your taste (and number of people you are feeding)!

Don’t have any left over potatoes?  Use frozen Southern Style Hash Browns (you know, the tiny square thingys).  Don’t like mushrooms?  Leave them out!  Want a bit of color?  Add some green or red pepper.

Personally, I add a little garlic, chives and Lawry’s to mine and I’m a happy camper.

Now go and make some hash for your family for supper tonight.  Because, you’re like, drooling on your keyboard and it’s kinda gross.

 

*Double triple bonus points for this recipe from the fact that it is adapted from something my Mom used to make for us when I was a kid.  She worked her arse off but always had something hot and nummy for us for supper.

**Really?  You got moose?  Let me know how that tastes, ‘K?

 

Taxes, Snow and Apple Blossoms

Apr 162012
 

Today was proof positive that Mother Nature is in control.  Unbeknownst to me, April 16 = snow in the Northwoods (and here I thought it was just the due date for getting taxes done).  About 1/2 inch was ordered today, and another unknown fact came about that I was unaware of:  the ground was cold enough to let it accumulate. 

Which makes me sad, because all I can think about are the strawberry plants and all my other perennials getting cold under that blanket of white.

One thing that I didn’t have to worry about were my little starter plants in the new greenhouse.  They are all nice and toasty warm because of the space heater we placed in it.  I finally have some tomato plants popping up through the soil, and some of the flower seeds that I planted have joined the party.

There’s always one sign of Spring that I miss:  Apple Blossoms.  When we moved up north, Nichole would always send me pictures of our old apple trees when they were in bloom.  These pictures always made me smile with fond memories.  So when we went down to the old homestead on Saturday, I was practically giddy, hoping that I would get to see those blossoms with my very own eyes for the first time in 11 years.

Well, they weren’t in full bloom yet, but they did try their hardest to show me that everything was fine and dandy in the apple world.  I think it’s about time that I got a couple trees and plant them on the new lots we’re buying.

Then I can take pictures in the Spring and send them to Nichole.

 

Closing Another Chapter

Apr 152012
 

I had been watching the forecast all week, praying that the weather would be good.  I was teased almost daily:  yes, there will be rain; no, it will be sunny.  The weather gods certainly weren’t going to make this easy.

And then Saturday morning came and the sun shone brightly.  Well, at least it did in the Northwoods.  But we were heading south to the old homestead to clean out the garage in preparation for the new renters that would soon be moving in.  We had a big chore ahead of us and I really didn’t want cold, crappy rain to hamper our efforts.

As we left the safety of the big woods, the sky looked ominous.  Was it rain?  Fog?  Oh, there’s some sun poking through, maybe it was just dark clouds giving me a little scare.  Little did I know that just a few miles a head of us there was rain coming down… and by the time we reached our halfway mark it had moved on and it was going to be beautiful weather for our task ahead.

Phew… dodged that bullet!

Nichole & Corey were gracious enough to volunteer in our efforts to clean out 20 years of accumulated junk.  Not just stuff that Rick & I had left behind, but things that our daughters had stashed away over the years when they had stayed in the house after we moved north.  And it wasn’t your normal garage either (remember, we don’t do normal in this family):  there was an attic to the garage that was plum full of crap stuff.

After 4 hours, the 10 yard dumpster we rented was overflowing.

So was the trailer that the kids had brought as well as the back of their pickup.

We had our own share of treasures that we brought home, along with old computer equipment that has to be hauled to the recycling center.

Lots of memories were rediscovered that day as we picked through boxes:  old photos, clothes, my diary from when I was young (which promptly went in the dumpster), games the kids used to play when they were little.

And if you think that we did all of this heavy lifting and sorting on an empty stomach, you’re sorely mistaken.  Nichole brought homemade breads, fruit, crackers and cheese curds (yummy!) to keep our strength up (thanks Colie!!)

Another chapter was closed that day.  One that contained many years of our life in that little town by the Rush River.  But new pages are being written every day as we go about our life in the Northwoods.

And some day there will be another garage that will need to be cleaned out.  And this one has a bigger attic to it.

 

 Older Entries  Newer Entries